The wilderness.

This morning I woke up before Sullivan, a rarity, and made my coffee. I cleaned up some dog pee (poor girls are so old) and let the gaggle of pets out for their morning break. I looked out my kitchen window at the bare and snowy mountains, as I often do, admiring where I live, the place I’ve come to call home, the place I love, and feel at peace. As I watched the snow melting away I realized I had a new feeling. It was a sliver, a bubbling up, just the slightest bit of clarity.

There have been times in the past months of my life where I knew I was trudging deep through the wilderness. I had been living there already, it didn’t start a few months ago. It didn’t start 4 1/2 years ago. I think I’ve been there most of my adult life. Today, this mundane and beautiful Tuesday, I’ve made it to the break in the trees where you can see the light filtering through the thinning branches. What’s coming with that light is the small, still voice of self recognition…it’s telling me I don’t have to be the caretaker of the world. It’s leading me and showing me how to have a balanced life.

This thing, this shiny and glittery thing, it’s one I plan to hold on to.

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